WhatDoISay.org
Proven by research
When someone we care about is not doing well emotionally, it's natural to feel helpless. But research keeps finding the same thing. Connections reduce depression and protect against suicidal thoughts or actions.
"What we know to be true: community connection is one of the most powerful protective factors for suicide prevention"
(2020)
An Australian study of 5,000 people showed that the more connections a depressed person had the more their depression improved, and the less the risk their depression would return. (Cruwys et al)
(2024)
A very large review of 118 studies with more than 690,000 people found that people with more social support were less likely to have suicidal thoughts, make plans or attempts, or die by suicide (Darvishi et al., 2024).
(2024) U.S. CDC Strategy
In 2024, the U.S. Centers for Disease Control (CDC) identified community involvement as a first line strategy in a new approach to suicide prevention.
(2025): Suicide Prevention Australia
"What we know to be true: community connection is one of the most powerful protective factors for suicide prevention."
(2026): Australian research
In a national study of young Australians aged 16 to 24, feeling connected to others was the ONLY social factor linked with lower odds of both suicidal thoughts and self-harm. Each step up in connectedness was linked with about half the odds (52% lower for suicidal thoughts, 55% lower for self-harm) (Robertson et al., 2026). Cruwys T, Dingle GA, Haslam C, Haslam SA, Jetten J, Morton TA. Social group memberships protect against future depression, alleviate depression symptoms and prevent depression relapse. Soc Sci Med. 2013;98:179-86. doi:10.1016/j.socscimed.2013.09.013 Darvishi et al. The role of social support in preventing suicidal ideations and behaviors: a systematic review and meta-analysis. Journal of Research in Health Sciences. 2024;24(2):e00609. PubMed 39072545. Robertson AM, Sheanoda V, Campbell P, Knight E, Cruwys T, Proulx JDE, Rathbone JA, Reynolds KJ. Among key social determinants, connection associated with lowest odds of non-suicidal self-injury and suicidal ideation among Australian youth. Australian and New Zealand Journal of Psychiatry. 2026;60(7):666–676. doi:10.1177/00048674261438055. Suicide Prevention Australia. Newsletter, October 2025. "What we know to be true: community connection is one of the most powerful protective factors for suicide prevention." Nieves Murray CEO
Applying the Research: Wrapping a safety net around someone
You don't need to be a professional to offer connection. You just need to reach out. They trust you!
One message is a single thread. Messages and videos from several people over days and weeks start to form a net: an emotional safety net around someone who is going through a hard time.
More messages, more people, more protection. Parents, brothers and sisters, partners, friends, workmates, managers, grandparents and housemates can all play a part.
Keep going. One visit or phone call is rarely enough. We encourage regular contact until the hard time passes or professionals are involved.
Small and simple is fine. "I'm thinking of you. No need to reply." can mean a great deal.
These services are for you too. Supporting someone you love can be hard, and you deserve support as well.
Why a message or short video is easier than a big talk
Friends and family are often the first people to realise something is wrong or be asked for help. In a national Australian study, young people aged 14 to 17 who had made a suicide attempt most often had turned to friends (74%) and parents (49%) for help with emotional problems. Only 8% had used a phone helpline and 10% had seen a GP (Terhaag S. Suicidality and help seeking in Australian young people; Australian Institute of Family Studies, Child Family Community Australia; 29 October 2020. https://aifs.gov.au/resources/short-articles/suicidality-and-help-seeking-australian-young-people) Most of us freeze. When someone seems low, or hints at not coping, we're often so afraid of saying the wrong thing, or don’t know what to say, that we say nothing at all (Resolve Strategic survey of 2,000+ people conducted by the Australian Suicide Prevention Foundation in 2022) Face-to-face talks can feel stressful or embarrassing for both people. A message is gentler. It doesn't put anyone on the spot, and it can be read when the person is ready. A video message carries even more power without the pressure to respond, giving everyone time to think more clearly. It comes from you. A message from a familiar name on their own phone means far more than a message from a stranger. Your relationship is what gives the words their power